별풍선 624개를 선물한 '한자시험2급'은 내 고등학교 동창이다. 채팅창에서 본인이 직접 이름을 밝히지는 않았으나 아이디를 보고 눈치챘고 내가 해당인임을 묻자 맞다고 했다. 

그는 학창시절 유순한 성격에 공부를 잘해 당시 남자 동창생들에게 괴롭힘을 많이 당했다. 나는 물리적으로 괴롭히는 데 직접 가담하지는 않았으나 방관자이자 말로만 이 친구의 편을 들어주는 척하면서 오히려 심리적으로 괴롭히는 데 일조했다. 고등학교 졸업 후에도 인연이 이어졌으나 나의 제멋대로인 언행 탓에 멀어졌다. 제대로 사과를 한 적은 없다. 그리고 몇 년간 연락하지 않다가 페이스북에 내가 올린 아프리카 방송 홍보 글을 보고 들어온 듯하다. 

나는 백남준의 '머리를 위한 선' 작업을 끝내고 그에게 몇 년 만에 연락했다. 답장은 없었다. 방송을 끝낸 며칠 뒤 여전히 마음이 켕겨 다시 연락했고 여전히 답장은 없었다.

There was a person who gave me 624 ‘ByeolPoongSun’ who I assumed that the person is my former schoolmate in high school. In the first time when he appeared in chat room of my personal broadcasting showroom he did not use actual name of him, but I just noticed him by his nickname. And I could be sure about him after I just ask him.

He was mild and great student, but he was bullied by male classmates in high school because of the jealousy. I did not attend to bully him physically, but I sort of tormented him by remaining as a spectator of bullying and pretending to be on his side from the teeth forward. My behavior did not look like bullying, but it was more likely bullying him around psychologically. I had keep in touch with him after graduation, but we grew apart because of my spoiled behavior. I have never apologized to him. We didn't contact for several years. I guess my facebook post for promoting my show was let him came to my show.

After I represented the performance ‘Zen for Head’ of NamJune Paik in show, I tried to contact him in years. However there was no reply. Few days after the try, my awkward feeling made me contact him for apology again, but still I could not have any reply from him.